This starts off innocently enough. I’ve told the kids that anyone who cracks a joke that actually makes me laugh gets ice cream. (They keep telling me bad jokes and then asking if they’re funny. E.g. “What’s a watermelon’s favorite food? Hatchet wratchet.” I’m not about lying my kids about the comedic value of their jokes. I tell them to try again.)
The other day, Five remembered a joke from his teacher, which I wasn’t expecting.
“Mom, why can’t you give Elsa a ballon?”
“Why?”
“Because she will let it go.”
As soon as I laughed out loud, he said, “Can I get an ice cream?!”
I said, of course, and then asked him if he made up the joke or heard it somewhere.
“My teacher told me last year.”
So I told his teacher at drop off the joke and the ice cream; and there was more laughter.
Later that day, Five wanted me to recount the above to DH but I forgot. So in the morning, I shared it with him.
“Yes he told me that when we were peeing together.”
“How did it come about that you were peeing together? Where were you?”
“The back yard,” he responded with a half smirk, half proud expression.
“I hope it wasn’t anywhere people step!”
“No, I watered the plants.”
“I don’t know why you call it ‘watering the plants.’ The ammonia in urine isn’t good for the plants.”
“Actually, urine contains phosphorus and other plant growth stimulants which are really good for the grass, especially if there is a drought.”
“I’m not buying it. Where did you hear that?”
Pulling out his phone, he reads a paragraph about how urine is good for plants.
“What site is that? I’m going to need a citation.”
“AI.”













































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